Saturday, August 20, 2016

Staying in Shape In the Slammer

Welcome to prison!  Depending on your length of stay in the big house, you'll need a few pointers to survive your sentence.  Serving time behind bars is both mentally and physically challenging.  As a convicted felon and now a professional bail bonding agent,  know first hand what it's like to spend 24 hours a day in a small concrete box.  Prison life is mostly miserable, but there are ways you can make your days a little brighter.  Hi.  My name is Bob and I've been enlisted by the Department of Corrections to put together a prison life guide for new jail inmates.  I'm honored and humbled to pass along my life experiences and knowledge to help others making the transition from the real world to a scary world behind bars.

Workout with your Bail Agent

In the slammer, you're going to need to take your mind off the depressing state of your existence.  Yes, prison time is no fun, but it serves a very important purpose.  As a felon and a bail agent, I counsel inmates on a daily basis to help them overcome depression, anxiety and hopelessness.  As my bail bonding agent once told me: head to gym to clear your head.  It's that simple.  While in prison, depending on your behavior, you will get at least one hour a day to spend outside.  During this time, you should arrange for your bail service bonding company to meet you at the outdoor prison gym to workout.  Your agent will be your spotter while bench pressing and motivate you to push yourself beyond your limits.  Working out and lifting weights not only makes you physically stronger ,but it keeps you mentally stable.  Maintaining composure and keeping your emotions in check will help you survive even longer in the state pen.  If you need help with a workout program, ask your bail bonding agent to put together a plan designed specifically for you.

Bail Bonding Agents and Chess

If you're not motivated to break a sweat, ask your bail bonding agent to smuggle you a handmade wooden chess set.  Playing chess is another great way to pass the time in prison.  Much like in the real world, you need to develop problem solving skills and planning to play chess.  The more chess you play with your cell mate or your bail bonding agent , the more mentally prepared you will be when it's time for parole. And trust me, the parole board looks highly upon inmates who develop a deep passion for the game of chess.  In fact, if you win the jail chess tournament with your bail bonding agent you may have a few years shaved off your sentence.  Sounds pretty good to me.

Stay Fresh and Clean with help from your Bail Agent

When you're living in tight quarters, maintaining a high level of personal hygiene is a must.   If you refuse to shower, you may be forced to live in solitary confinement for two weeks straight.  And you do not want to go to solitary confinement. As a felon and bail bonding agent, I can tell you solitary confinement makes your jail cell look like the Hilton.  In your next care package from your bail bonding agent, ask for Irish Spring, a nice terry cloth towel, 100 % organic lavender honey handmade soap and deodorant.  These simple items will keep you fresh and clean throughout your stay in the state prison.  Oh, and don't forget your toothbrush.  But, as your bail bonding agent will tell you, you can't have just any toothbrushes.  In most prisons, electronic toothbrushes are banned.  However, a good old fashion manual toothbrush is allowed and will keep your teeth in check for the duration of your sentence.

In San Antonio Texas the very best bail bond company is McRae Bail Bonds.  Not only will they get you home fast but they really care about you and take care of you.  Hopefully you won't ever need their services.  But if you ever do its nice to know who your friends are.  They are a PBT member.

When you take care of yourself while in the slammer, you become more level headed like your professional bail bonding agent.  And when you're calm, you're more likely to become an upstanding model inmate.  As your bail agent will tell you, the more you follow the rules, the more likely it is your sentence will be reduced and you'll get to see your family that much sooner.  If you ever need more tips on how to stay in shape while in the slammer, email me or contact your prison recreational director.